London Diaries - Time for a Cuppa - Farm Girl

So..Amma's here and I don't have a clue how the days are running past me. If there's anyone in this world who enjoys strolling through markets tirelessly and can do it over and over again and not complain or get bored, it has to be her. Well, I do know of a few others, but amma's enthusiasm is something else. 

We had reserved one afternoon for a lazy but thorough stroll around Portobello Market in Notting Hill, she remembered the little details of this place from her previous visit but we just had to go there again. 

We left home after lunch as amma still doesn't prefer eating out here as the options offered on the table just don't live up to her taste buds, so a post lunch getaway is what we settled for. 

We walked the entire length of Portobello road all the way from Notting Hill Station, stopping at most shops - Alice was a must, the map shop & the photo prints shop was ticked off too. We did a quick mandatory 'Cake stop' at the hummingbird bakery for the sweet tooth. After about 4 hours of wandering we headed back to Notting hill and was craving for a quiet little place where we could sit down, may be warm ourselves up and reflect on what we did. Yeah... I know that sounds too profound for a random walk in the market, but    such places so unique calls for a bit of that.

We stumbled upon Farm Girl for 2 specific things - the Wisteria creeper that grew on it's doorway (which is my new found love this season)  and the writing on the wall. A bit of a weirdo here, but yes, this is exactly what made me walk in. 

It was a quirky little cafe at first sight, a bit hippieish and spoke healthy, fresh, calm, colourful, everything goes the day you make it kinda place.  The green tiled decor gave the place a garden feel which is most welcome.

The options at the bar were not too many but we just wanted some a warm drink so I picked the afternoon blend for my tea and amma choose a latte - oh yes! we love our coffee with lots of milk.  We settled down at a corner table and were greeted to a big pitcher of water with lemon. Any place which offers generous amounts of water without asking scores immediately with me. We really needed that. 

Just as we settled in I had to get us an almond croissant which won over the banana & coconut cake. No regrets! It was probably one of the best Almond croissant I had in a very long time.  The tea & coffee with the friendly smiley staff all went down a treat. We felt rejuvenated from this little stop. All the cutlery were colourful stoneware which was  earthly and yet very stylish. 

I looked through the menu & it offers dairy free options , including ice creams for the lactose intolerant. I had to tell my friend about this place as she would really appreciate places that cater to those who need dairy free. 

It was an expensive place, so on those terms it makes me think I should explore an alternative, but for which it ticks the box for what you'd look for in a coffee shop and given that it's such a quaint one on an otherwise busy street. 

 

Highway

 I don't usually write a review about a movie or a book as I don't think I am worthy enough to publish my say on someone's hard work.   This isn't a review, though I am happy to recommend anyone reading this to watch the movie - if you haven't already. 

Highway, is perhaps the first movie that made me think I should write about. Now, let's be clear,  I am not saying it is the best movie ever. I would probably not go away and watch it 100 times over like I do with a few other movies, some that I had written about a while ago. I didn't love all the songs, I did think it was slow paced, I thought it could have been shorter, which, by the way, I think about every Hindi movie I watch these days. But, in spite of sounding so negative about it so far, there were enough things in the movie that made me think about it, made me go back to it even when it was over. 

This movie made me connect with it in more ways than one. I could relate with the character, with the free spirit, with the travels and tales that come with it, with taking each day as it comes and mainly with 'NOT having a plan'. It must sound like I live in a fancy fairy tale taking each day as it comes, not knowing where I am headed, just go with the flow and all that. But, in all honestly, when I give it a thought or two, I have been doing that for more years than I care to remember. 

Traveling is something that can catch up with most people pretty easily. It's addictive. You plan a travel, make your bookings and go away for a while and I bet, a few days after you return, you're most likely browsing and reading about the next potential travel if not booking it. 

I love to travel too but my travel needs to have a factor of nature to it. A week in the most expensive beach resort just does not attract me. Instead, tell me we are going for a cycling tour of 3 days for 8hrs a day and I am all up for it. Guess you know what I am talking about.  That thrill to experience the place in your own way, by touching it, but connecting it with simple things like climb a hill, wash your feet on a brook, look up at the sky and observe the stars and just marvel at the solid mountain range that stands so strong. Highway brought out that person who enjoys going out and about and relishing the moment - whatever the place and situation has to offer, feeling that place and taking in what it has to offer. 

One of my wildest fantasies have been to hitchhike a ride on a lorry (well... a truck!) in India and voila! the movie is shot mostly on a truck and the road and the pit stops of this journey. The way the cargo lorry system operates in India makes me wonder. It probably is such a lonely job, when you see those drivers take these truck loads to many miles away with almost a week or so on the road and the only point of contact with people, the communication and interaction would be when they stop for a refreshment, that little cup of tea may be. There must be so many stories associated with a travel like that, but it makes me think if they really think about it as an adventure. Do they not think of it as their job? their Bread & butter? Surely, it's hard,being away from family, being on the road constantly without really a familiar place, I bet they do it for a living and not for the kick that the travel gives you for the likes of you and me. This character is perfectly portrayed by Ranveer Hooda in the film. You know that this man holds many stories with him behind that hard exterior one sees. Haven't we seen many such people, many of these lorry drivers taking a little break at a dhaba on the highway? 

Imtiaz Ali, the director, must be a wanderer of sorts. The way he has brought in the music of the road, of the region blend in to the main story makes it so real. The things that Veera, played by Alia Bhatt ends up doing - talking to herself, gape at a hill and the next minute you are climbing it, the many stops for chai, sitting on a rock and just looking at the scenery or should I say the non-existence of a scenery. Something as simple as making Maggi in a little hut up the hill or the fact that she doesn't think about the next day. She's living that moment like she's in a dream world captured me really dearly. 

"Jahan se tum mujhe laye ho, mein wahan wapas nahi jaana chahti.

 Jahan bhi le ja rahe ho, wahan pahunchna nahi chahti.

 Par yeh raasta, yeh bahut accha hai.

 Mein chahti hoon ki yeh raasta kabhi khatam na ho."

These words did it for me.  I cannot remember the number of times I have wished that the ride never ended, that feeling of coming to an end and not being able to re-create the moment happens when we reach the destination. All we have left is the memories of the road. 

“Life is a journey, not a destination.” 

― Ralph Waldo Emerson 

How true was this man saying this? I don't think I agree with this more at this stage in my life. Let's see what a few years down holds for me. But for now, I am happy to stick to this.

                               

Window Seat

Yes, I have one on my train from London to Nottingham. From the time I remember, I have never said no to a train journey. I sometimes feel like I live in a little fantasy world I have created for myself where the simplest of things gets me thrilled.

It’s almost a decade ago that I was working in Chennai and made weekend trips back home to Bangalore (Yes… Bangalore and not Bengaluru!).  My world revolved around trains, booking centres and train stations. I also had this bizarre idea about working in the train station where I can announce the arrivals and departures in Hindi & Tamil. Something about naming the unknown and faraway places gave me a weird thrill. Like a train from Chennai to Delhi – wow! A long way to go.

I have to  get a window seat, preferably forward facing and no matter how many times the same route is taken, I have to look out for every station called and look outside at the passing landscape even if it was a rather plain non-dramatic scenery.  So a night journey was something I didn’t look forward to as much. I couldn’t sleep well – with the restlessness about where we are and how far we have come to the worry of what’s happening to my belongings and finally the Ticket collector nudging you to check your tickets just when you thought you could doze off.

The trains in the western world are, needless to say, different. For a start, they are extremely clean. They can be cozy, well, if the air con setting is correct, if not it can be quite chilly too. They are definitely fast, so you can really cover a lot of distance is not so much time. However, for  me, are 3 things about train rides here to back home that make a world of difference.

The uneventfulness, if I can say that is what doesn’t make me remember anything special about the train rides here. For a start, there is hardly any form of conversation with anyone, so you see I can sit there typing all this up! Secondly, it’s the food – the cold drinks, cold sandwiches and a few packs of chips (well…crisps as it’s called here) just don’t do it for me. God! Do I miss the fresh hot food coming out of the pantry car – and I am specifically talking about the Lalbagh Express which provided all this and enough entertainment for the rides back home. For a third, it’s the fact that it is so quiet which isn’t a bad thing, you can actually listen to music, read and sleep (if you can) at peace. But peculiar as it may seem I miss that Chug-Chug -Chuk-Chuk sound that is so characteristic of trains.

I have more stories to speak about my train rides 10 years ago than I have done in the past 6 years – and I know I have done more here than back home.

Nevertheless, the train journeys in the UK make you go through undramatic Rolling Meadows, the countryside is beautiful and can be quite picture perfect on a lovely day, but there is no huge change in the landscape – there is a monotony to it which is actually quite peaceful.

Train rides bring out the side of me which often does not surface.  It’s one of the few times when I don’t think much, the mind is inactive and just watching the scenes pass by taking in what comes along the journey

Cure the Crisis

Little experiences in life add so much to the way you do and see things. One such event is what I want to talk about here. 

A few years ago I volunteered at this little charity which runs during Christmas for the homeless people - it was a small unknown place and I loved being a part of it for my time there. I remember it as being enjoyable, also a bit frustrating and very exhausting (I know....I am so bad). I thought a bout it as a nice thing to do and left it there. Though the thought crossed my mind that I could do more of this, I never got my act together. 

This Christmas I picked it up again. Having known that I have days off during the time and not much to do I decided to enrol myself with 'Crisis at Christmas' who are perhaps the biggest organization in all of Europe doing work around homelessness.

Not knowing what I really wanted to do, I put my name as a general volunteer. If you are a professional, you can also add yourself for Kitchen duties, IT Support, Medical Services and such others. A general volunteer could be doing anything from serving meals, to sitting at the information desk, to manning the entrances and exits, to keeping a check at the luggage lounge or the art and craft centre, the shower facilities and so on. 

A complete volunteer led group that it is, you could see some really amazing organization of tasks, duties, roles - everything just seemed to have run so smooth. Each of us had another volunteer paired with us for every activity, so it never really felt like you were in it alone. It gives you a chance to interact with all the other wonderful people who give up their personal time to do this and understand why they connect with it. It's inspiring to hear the story behind why they choose to do this, also interesting and perhaps  a reality check on how we are so engrossed in our lives that this experience is somewhat surreal. 

Crisis arranged an induction programme for first time volunteers to give us an idea of what to expect, the do's and don'ts and it was such a well planned presentation that I was already quite sure that the process would be smooth.

  

It's amazing to see professionals  - doctors, dentists, hair dressers, masseurs, advisers provide their services. 

The kitchen staff ensuring that the people (our guests as we learn to call) get proper meals - a hot plate of food. The shower rooms are kept ready so they can have a warm shower, the IT room is ready with computers for the people to have a little cyber space, the TV room and cinema is showing movies everyday, the art & craft room is open for the creative lot, sports rooms with table tennis, luggage room to store their belongings, tea & coffee all day long.

 

It was great to see the happiness when they had their hot shower and came out all fresh, the excitement to know that they can get a haircut or enjoy a full hot meal with a dessert. They were thrilled to know there was a masseur, Relieved to know they can leave their belongings overnight at a place where they don't have to worry about it being stolen.

These were things that are so inconceivable to the normal you and me. How often do we think whether we cannot have that simple hot shower or a meal a day or get a haircut and look presentable ? Perhaps Never?  

The worry that you have to carry everything that you possibly own always on you. Can't leave it anywhere....don't have a place to leave it. 

It's hard to imagine and live knowing that as the night falls and the crowds recede, the shops close, businesses end there is no place to go, that a new footpath, garden bench, parking lot needs to be searched for a place to retire for the night.

That very thought makes me count my blessings, that I am so lucky to have been born, raised and living a life where everything is kinda normal where my worries seem so small when compared to what some of these people have.

The List is Ready - Resolutions - 2014

I started this madness last year where I thought of making a part of my things to do for the year public - I felt accountable, responsible and it helped me keep a check at things, I am kinda pleased with the results and am taking the plunge again to publicly show off how big an idiot I am (yet again!) 

As crazy is it may seem I am publishing this again.  My list for 2014 is ready and this is it! I have taken it easy on a few things - no hard set goals this time, I had to omit a few out as it's not entirely in my hands - dependency is a bad thing! and I have some items not published here and lets see how well I can keep up to that. 

I had to carry over a couple of items from last year and continue working on a few others  but have a longish list of new items too. Exciting, Driven and still a little scared about a few of them - Let's see...only  time will tell. 

Here we go....

Make a Daily Habit  - I must say I do keep up to it quite well, however, the past year saw me going through a Love-Hate relationship with books - I want to change the status to a simple 'Like' and want to set aside at 30 minutes to an hour a day to read. I want to make sure I don't have gaps and would like to read everyday. 

Don't bank on the memory - Pick up the diary again. Don't write stories (as we know what happens after a couple of months), don't write only sad things (as we know we will never read them). Just pencil in a what happened that day and make a note if something nice or not so nice happened. Come on... that should not be so hard! 

Get out of the Comfort zone - I could rename this 'Conquer a Fear' - All this while I have either been driving people away from me or driving crazy those who stay. I want need to learn how to drive. Enough of laziness, enough of pushing things around, enough of escaping.  Need to learn how to drive - and this time in a correct methodical way.

Explore a Passion- Pick up the camera again and stop being (just) a smart phone photographer - I can't completely say I have discovered my passion but Photography is something I have enjoyed doing. I want to take this up as a project and work towards it. The actual project may take another year or two, but I want to start my work on it. At the end of this year, I should at least have the content, a plan, research done. 

Be Good with Food - I don't think I eat a lot of unhealthy food but definitely want to keep a check at what's going inside my body and not go too crazy with junk food. One thing I consciously need to act on is not to waste food. I tend to cook too much and the rest is not used or I buy too many things and have to throw them as they have expired - Need to stop this.  

Change a tad bit of the lifestyle - Wake up Early - something I have 'NEVER' managed to do. The past year was the worst, I slept late, woke up late and ended up at work really late on so many days of the week. I would like to wake up nice and early and have some time to eat my breakfast and not skip it. 7am is the aim now.... would love to make it 6:30!  (Currently it's between 8:00 - 8:30am). I would definitely do a lie in every now and then, but I'd want the majority of the days to be an early start. Let's see! This will be hard. 

Stay Connected -  I'll take the lesson from mom again 'You do your bit and don't expect the other to do the same for you'. I have realized that my happiness lies in being connected to the people I love - family & friends and I don't want to run into months of not staying in touch. I want to get through the year knowing that I stayed connected and not thinking that it's been 6 months and I don't have a clue.

(Try to) Give up something - I'm tempted to write no alcohol for 2 months again. But, I would say restrict - may be not have a drink every week. If I can skip a couple of weeks in every month I would think I've done well here. 

I want to add a second item - biting my nails :(  which has 'NEVER' happened until now.   

Need to stick to these: 

Stay Fit - Have enjoyed the gym from the past 3 months. I need to just keep at it and not quit. The Plan is to maintain the 3-times a week workout to stay the way I am if not better it. 

Do something for someone- Volunteering has been good but the 10K run was good too. I want to do another 10K this year and enroll in at least 3 different volunteer activities. 

Do something you like-  Write, Click and Travel - as fancy as they may sound, I would like to do more of all this and in a way they can be interconnected. Write at least 3 blog posts per month. Write all travelogues till date and the on the new travels (hopefully) I take. 

Keep the Faith/Keep the Culture- Two Festivals to celebrate  -need to really work on this one. 

Carrying Over from the Last Year:

Try something again- I want to grow plants and NOT kill them. My aim is to maintain atleast 5 pot plants which I hope will nourish under my care.

Better planning - this is a wide topic. To start with its planning holidays, planning for activities during the  weekend,  planning my time when I go home - If someone asks me what I did when I last visited home, I dont have much to say - I want to change that. 

That is it! So, I guess it's time to start working now. If you managed to get through till here, Thank you and Wish you a very Happy New Year. 

Check Off the 2013 Bucket List

Overall, I would say 2013 was my worst year ever. The past year pulled me down every single time I tried to stand up. I was unbelievably rude, disconnected, alone and lost for most of it.  Trying too hard to please everyone and keep everyone happy, I have done no good to being sane and happy with what I really want.  Juggling away too many things, I don't think I gave justice to anything which needed it's due. 

In a way, I am happy that the worst is done and it's time for better days. Revisiting lists is good and striking things off the list is better. 

About a year ago, I had made these plans for 2013, it's unbelievable how this  year has gone by and we have set foot in a new one. I'd like to take a re-look at this, publishing it here did help me get on with it - perhaps a little better than the other personal list I had for myself. So.. here we go... 

• Try something again- I want to grow plants and NOT kill them. My aim is to maintain atleast 5 pot plants which I hope will nourish under my care. This was a Non-Starter. Though the thought crossed my mind a few times through the year, I actually did nothing about it. A FAIL. 

• Stay Fit- I still detest going to the gym, however the weather being cold I have stopped doing my runs too. The aim is to do some kind of exercise at least 2 times in the week ( tempted to say 3, but thats the start of things going downhill).  I haven't felt this fit ever before in my life. The ME TIME was used well.  I'd like to give this a yellow as this isn't a destination and it would always be a work in progress 

• Better planning - this is a wide topic. To start with its planning holidays, planning for activities during the  weekend,  planning my time when I go home- If someone asks me what I did when I last visited home, I dont have much to say - I want to change that.  A complete FAIL. The one holiday we took was a super bad plan and the fact that I had 8 days left of leave with nothing to do at the end of the year sums up this item on my list. 

• Learn something New - I want to learn how to play a musical instrument. The plan is to learn how to play 5 known tunes on it.  Did manage to learn 3.5 tunes on the Flute - still loving the instrument but a long long way to go. 

• Do something for someone - Run a 10K -at least 1 for a charity. Managed a 10K for Race for Life Charity with 3 other friends and raised close to £300 for the cancer research. (Very Pleased). Also managed a day at Crisis for homeless people -What an experience. Hope to do more. 

• Do something you like- Write more- at least 2 blogs per month.  One of the most enjoyable things I have managed this year. Again, would like to keep it going. 

• Get out of the comfort zone - The Journal - This is a little project I took on myself last year but left it mid way ( like most other things). It's my collection of notes about life and living in London- need to atleast complete 10 chapters this year. Changed the plan a little bit, instead of keeping it all too serious, I took the route of writing up my London Diaries - It's going OK, nothing special

• Keep the Faith - Visit Subramanya - my most favourite temple on Earth and haven't visited it in more than 5 years. I hope I can manage a visit this time. Yes! Thank you dear God (and mom & dad and bro) for making this happen. 

• Keep the Culture - Celebrate at least 2 festivals this year in a simple way.  Can't really strike it out as the only one I did was Ganesha habba. Would have loved to celebrate Diwali, but was painting the house instead. 

• Set a goal - 100kms in 100days - let's see! - Yes! a big strike off and I am now doing 50km every month in running. Will take it easy on this one in the coming year. 

• Give up something - Alcohol free Month - 2 months....come on that shouldn't be hard!  - Yes! February and September (ok ok.. the shortest months!) - But, the detox was good :)

Now it's time to make a new list and I am so looking forward to it in all it's grand silliness. It does help to keep me look forward to something and I get a sense of responsibility by publishing it here. Well, I'm glad you're over 2013, you weren't really my best. 

It's Engineered - Part 3

After a few years into this I can say that I kind of understood what I had to do for the rest of the journey - just don't think, take each day at a time and enjoy the ride. 

Well, it's fair to say that there is a method in the madness. The Part1 and Part2 shows the zombi-ness with which I was going through the course. I had now begun to somewhat like what I was doing. At least when it worked, it was a good subject to study. 

I did feel a bit under pressure that I had topped the class the previous semester and wanted to come out with a decent score - you know the one time wonder syndrome was haunting me through the 5th semester. I was scared that I would fail miserably again and this time it will be seen as a bigger thing. 

I did notice the attitude of everyone - the lecturers, the HOD, some of the class mates, the lab attendants change in favour of me. They all seemed to think that I am this hard working, good girl and didn't get any nasty stares or comments from anyone. 

The temporary confusion in 5th Sem was the choice of electives that we had. Needless to say, my confused brain had no clue of what to choose, what's good , also what's easy and so on. This was the same for the next few semesters to come as 2 subjects had to be electives. We did make our decision and I didn't have any major issues with any other than Power electronics - had have no clue about what this was all about. 

I was comfortable planning my semester and brought about a good study-play balance. I planned to do combined study with a friend of mine who was from a different branch (telecom) and a different college. We made it a point to study the 1 or 2 common subjects we had together. I also had a very dear friend come home every single day from the other end of the city to study together with me. If not for him, I don't think I would have had the interest, the motivation or drive to study anything. In a way owe my marks and my 'doing well with the studies' to this friend. 

The semester was packed with a fair amount of activities. We had a better plan in managing the books that seemed to disappear from the library really quick by getting them from an external library, did better sharing of notes and reference books. Planned to get xerox, yes! the 30paise ones well in advance. Planned little samosa chat outings. explored a few other restaurants, cafes near the college. Made it a point to window shop in pretty much every Handicraft sale that was around and had luncheons at each other's place just in the name of studying. 

Over innumerable courses of taste my mom's vegetable upma's to the lovely christmas cakes from another friend to the occassional Neer Dosa treats from another pal's mom we went through the busy days. 

We now knew all about where to get the cheapest components on SP Road to the books on Avenue Road, also made a point to have a 'VTU Syllabus' book as a backup which was easy to read and digest when compared to the huge reference books. 

With a few notes in the exam paper about - please-pass-me, I-need-36-to-pass to I-don't-know-the-answer-but-the-answer-is-in-this-book (I wrote this for Power electronics), I managed to pass and pass well. I was the topper for the university, thanks to a friend who told me as her college had put up a board of all university topper's in all branches and their college names. I had reached a stage where I didn't understand the scale of things - how important it was or how it might change my life. I am glad I didn't have a clue as it did not change anything in my life other than happier parents.

6th Semester introduces to the world of projects - a Mini project is what we had to complete. Our chance to design, document, implement and build something from scratch that will 'work'. Thanks to my dad who gave us an introduction and some space in his friend's little factory and we were ready with our project - 'Liquid Level Indicator & Controller'. It went down really well at college as we had attempted something that we were yet to study in the 7th sem. But what was a disaster was that we had no clue what we had designed as we took so much help to complete the project that nothing much had entered our brains. This whole project episode introduced us to the world of Electronic City and the travels there and typing an awful lot of pages on the computer where we had to search for letters and do 1 finger typing.

It was overall a good year and was happy with the 'I got hold of it feeling' and was also enjoying the subjects as I went along. 

It's Engineered - Part 2

So after the storm of Year1, a slight change is what is seen in the next year. By the way, did I forget to tell you about the bandh we had during our exams in Year 1 because Raj Kumar was kidnapped. That left us with just a few days off between year 1 and 2. Yeah! Things that happen!

Enter year 2 happened with half the class moving to their branch which was telecommunication, a few others who have moved on to take a branch change and few new faces who have moved into our branch from others. We also have a whole floor to ourselves in the building dedicated to Instrumentation, we have our own classrooms, department labs, HOD, lecturers and feel already quite an esteemed part of the process. Like a sense of cheap pride in belonging to something. 

There was still the factor of 'unknown' as I stepped through this year. I was aware of most things with the course - the 6theory+ 2labs per semester, the concept of internals & externals, the library books being unavailable, the 30p Xerox notes. But with every new year, new challenges happened.

We had our own lecturers and each came with their specialty (on and off the classroom). With it came the 'favouritism' and I obviously did not stand out in any way as a student, which did not help.  We either wrote notes all through the 1hr class or were distracted with the chain-smoker HOD holding the chalk-piece like a cigarette more than listening to him, or was trying not to laugh in the class of the lecturer who was Oh-so-delicate, or not move in the class of the hyper-alert-want-to-be-strict-lecturer, or try not to get caught in the foot-tapping-duster-banging-new-lecturer or try to understand what this lady-lecturer-who-dressed-like-a-housewife was doing here. (btw...learnt later that she was a gold medalist) 

The labs at our department were a disaster. They looked like they had not been cared for in a long long time.  We used to go in and spend almost 1/2 the allocated time in trying to find the components for the practicals in a big rubbish dump. Getting them to work was another story in itself. Don't know whether trying to understand the experiment was a bigger challenge or getting the components to work. To top that, we were divided into about 6-8 sub groups with 2 things working and we had to request fight to borrow the components from who got hold of it first. 

So, this whole episode introduced us to shopping with a completely different perspective. Commercial Street was replaced with SP Road, the plush shops of Brigade road was replaced with the electronic component shops on this SP Road, names like Adidas, Nike was changed to Vishal Electronics, Sangeetha electronics and a few others we frequented. Buying new books was never an option, so Avenue Road book shops and the road side pre-owned book stalls became our new best friend. It felt like I was running around like a headless chicken at times trying to get things rather than do something with them.

All this for joining a college which was termed a good one! 

Having classes in the morning kept us free most afternoons and evenings which gave us ample time to do the fun stuff. In between the dreams of we-will-do-this-when-we-have-more-money, we enjoyed the various adda's (hangouts) in the college. The staircase on the 7th floor where we shared the home-brought-food, the katte's (stone benches) around trees, hanging out in the dirtiest canteen one could have been to, cheap pleasures of having samosas and kachories and tea/coffee from the stalls outside college, the many lunch-outs at the various restaurants in Gandhi Bazaar and nearby areas became an every day life. We did treat ourselves to a matinee show or two and of course the trips to brigade road, MGs & commercial street had it's own excitement. 

Just stepping into the world of internet, we had our email accounts and played around sending each other one liners everyday. I remember having an account with chequemail.com which also sent me a cheque with Rs.50 for a month long use of emailing people. It seems like another world today.

Well...the 'studying' for exams would never have happened if not for the friends who helped do combined studies with me. Anyways... we only studied a few days before the exams and not otherwise. It became a norm. Oh! what fun it was doing those combined studies, I can't think of passing anything or 'understanding' anything in this year if not for the  studying together. Occasionally enjoying movies on DVD for a break. 

Semester 3 did end up being the nightmare I was dreading. I failed a lab. Well, let me not be humble and blame a few things -  a combination of me-not-understanding-the-subject + the components-not-working + i-got-one-of-the-toughest-experiments did not help me complete what I had to in the allocated time. The viva-voce was no more than a Hmmmm + Aaaah + Not sure + I-don't-know-the-answer-to-this.  Needless to say, I was totally shaken, I knew it the minute I finished the lab that this was not going to be a success. I broke down, cried like a baby with a friend beside me showing how a spring clip worked (See, Engineering all the way!), the way a spring clip bounces back in spite of being under pressure all the time. I think about this example even today when I am feeling crushed. 

So, the end of the 3rd semester was a FCD which we had previously craved for (First Class with Distinction- anything above 70%) however what it really showed up on my marks card was a big fat FAIL.  I don't have to mention what went through my dad's mind. The look he gave me when I announced my failure made me pray for the earth to suck me in. So, that was that. 

Just when I want to leave it behind and start fresh in the 4th sem I had to go through the embarrassment in class when every lecturer makes it a point to parade the topper of the class and failures of the class and me being the latter! Those who had scored less than me were still ok as they had managed to pass everything. It left me thinking I had to show this lot that I am not a bad student. So, 4th semester went through with the usual nuances of the course but with the determination to prove something. I don't think I had felt this bad about anything I had done or this determined about anything I was about to do ever in my life.  

Though with a bit of a chaos in planning the studies, the uncle (mentor) and cousin who had been through this course gave me all the books and notes they had which did come in handy. A K Sawhney's big fat book of Electrical and Electronic Measurements & Instrumentation became my new best friend. I joined Lab tuitions (eating more money from dad's pocket) to get through the 'failed' lab. This made it 6 theory + 3 labs for this semester. Again, the combined studies were a blessing and got me going. 

It was the day of the results and everyone from class were pouncing on the little department window with mesh on it inside which read the outcome of what you were in the past 6 months. The hyper-I-need-to-witness-the-reaction-of-students-getting-their-result lecturer and the I-love-to-give-a-piece-of-my-mind-to-every-student-and-make-them-feel-guilty-for-having-a-good-time lecturer were there to announce that I had failed again. Thank God that this was just them not-being-able-to-read-the-results-in-a-single-row - you see the name and university ID number are on the left hand corner of the results sheet with Internal marks, External marks and Pass/Fail for each subject in the middle area (which is 8*3 - 24 columns of data) and to the far right hand corner is what shows the grand finale of pass/fail and the Class in which you passed (if you did). So.... I was dejected all over again until this friend of mine shook me up to say that I had not only passed with an FCD but my marks were the highest for the entire class. That I had come first! Well... as they say, there is a first time for everything. 

What a mixed year that was. The first time I failed a subject and the first time I topped a class. I was happy, content and the heavy feeling I had carried with me for the 1/2 of the year was lifted but the sadness that I had failed stayed a little longer. The results of the lab came as a pass and I was relieved more than anything else. 

My dad just did not believe it and the uncle (mentor) was surprised how that happened!

Well.... I know it has been a bit of a story so far...1/2 way through the course and need to sustain the other half of the journey but at this point I was saying thank you to everyone who helped me get up and quietly enjoyed the moment. I would like to thank each and every one who stayed by me and let me know that it was no big deal. After all, today it doesn't matter that I had failed or that I had topped. 

Let me take a break from this.... Be back soon with 3 & 4. To be Continued.....

It's Engineered - Part 1

About  a decade ago was a time when I was excited about stepping into a new world, Having completed my university degree this was the time for me to get a job, have my own earning, be financially independent in a little way. 

The 4 years of engineering before that was some ride. Unlike most others who might have known what they wanted to achieve in life, I had no clue what I was getting into. This is my attempt to re-live those years of my life where I enjoyed what I did, but somehow had remained confused where it would lead me.

So, this is how it all started.....

I didn't score enough to get into a medical college which was my ambition in life...to be a doctor. I scored just about enough to get into a dental college but did I want to spend 5 years plus some more on studying teeth? Definitely didn't sound like the thing, it seemed like too much hard work. So, without further thought I jumped into the most obvious choice (obvious because I was getting a seat, many in the family had done this course and survived, the rest of the friends clan seemed to be opting for this as a choice of degree and career). 

I also had a mentor in my uncle who gave me that little extra push that this is a good option and reassured it won't kill me. The only illogical inputs I had were that I didn't want to pick architecture as a stream as it was a 5-year course and that I didn't want Computer science either as I didn't want to study anything where I couldn't touch and see things! So, I ended up with Instrumentation Technology just as it sounded alright and I knew two others in the family who had taken this subject.

All this for one of the key decisions in life!

I cannot really recollect the first few weeks in the college as there seemed to be crazy tension. We were in a class which had the 'Instrumentation (IT)' batch and the 'Telecommunication(Telecom)' batches together. Little had I known that the first year was common to everyone irrespective of what you had picked as your stream of engineering. Now, my mind which was full of IT had to park that thought for a year and get into the roller coaster ride of studying Physics, Chemistry, Maths (yes! all over again), Introductions to Mechanical, Civil, Electronics, Electrical, Engineering Drawing and any other branch of engineering one can think of, all in one go. I think back of it as so bizarre to have a basket of different subjects thrown in. 

I hadn't a clue why I was welding and soldering sheet metal wearing the bus conductor's uniform on one day and carrying a huge T-square and drawing sheets to draw objects I had never seen the use of, on another. I had no idea why I had to be scared careful of SOM (strength of materials) or understand the details of (re)-reading clarks tables or why 'Pointers' was so important as basics to any programming. With C-programming by Balaguruswamy to SOM by Bhavikatti as the books I always carried, I had no idea what gibberish was entering my brain trying to make sense of what was written in them. 

Having friends from Telecom meant that we wont be together from year 2. So, just as you were getting to know someone they are gone too soon. Some uber-bright students were already thinking about branch changes. My little brain did not think of this even as an option as I had been through this 'choosing your branch' process during CET (Entrance exam to get through a professional course) and did not want to re-visit those days of utter confusion again!

Unlike school and pre-university I was introduced to the world of 'reference books'.  6 theory + 2 labs every 6 months (semester aka sem) with each subject having at least 3 books to pick the notes from! To top that, the only place to go to for books being the college library and darn, even before you think about it as an option, the 4 copies of that book you so badly needed have already been taken by this geek-clan of your batch months before you knew where the library was!

So, here's welcome to the world of 30paise kerosene xerox (photocopies). So, by the end of each semester you have so many xerox notes from every tom dick and harry who called them important or 'superb-notes', that your room and your bed would smell like a petrol station. And you would have no way got through even 50% of it. So much for student-friendly options. 

In between the sessions of trying to imitate the lectures who kept us going - from the bespectacled Maths lecturer, to the lanky-I-hate girl-students chemistry professor, to the HOD of chemistry who dictated his love letter in the class, to the dramatic-new-trying-to-impress-and-get-a-grip-on-the-class Physics lecturer, to the I-put-THE-before-every-word in my sentence Drawing master, to the ferfectly funny mechanical engineering frofessor we prodded along from one class to another. 

Just as I was trying to find my bearings was yet another tension of internal exams and externals. The seniors seemed to take internals very lightly and so did I, after all I was trying to learn a thing or two from them. They qualified to know the system better as they had survived a year or two in this circus.  

Well... the gamble is this - Internal exams are for 25 marks and the externals are for 100 with a total of 125 that one can score per subject in the semester, The pass mark being 50/125. Well, you'd think that if you have 25/25 in internals all you need in the externals is a 25/100 which should not be hard. So very WRONG! You need to get a minimum of 35/100 to pass the externals however internals have no such concept of passing marks. 

So, with just 7, 11, 13 in some of the subjects I had managed in internals, I had to get the remainder in the externals which comes up to more than 35. The lesson about taking internals lightly was not quite right. For someone who had never really scored below 70, 35 seemed like so little but with the tension + Not-understanding-the-subject + I-don't-have-the-books + 'which-xerox-notes-to-read' its seemed like a herculean task. Well, somehow with or without the math I did manage to get through the year (even before I knew where it went) with a mere 65% thinking about those 95% days a year before and having upset my dad a tad bit. 

So with that I'd say Bye for now, I'll go and treat myself to the Rs.4 samosas and chai outside the college gate and have a quick semester break to continue the saga....

This happened to them (True Stories)

I find it quite hard to write stories, I see myself a better story teller when I am narrating it myself. I struggle to bring into words the intonations and the hand movements that are such a part of the 'talking me' which makes the story listen-able. 

My mother on the other hand is a brilliant story teller. Well, don't ask her about any movies (bollywood) that she has recently seen (especially if you want to watch it). She would have told it in such detail that you will be left tearing your hair apart if you happen to watch it. In fact, she would have glorified some parts of the film so much that you will also be disappointed that the director didn't do a good enough job of it. 

Well...these stories are true and have been narrated to me by the film encyclopedia that my mom is referred to fondly by my dad. I will try to do justice to the way it was narrated to me already knowing that something will be missed. 

Act of Kindness:

My ajji(grandma) is one of the most careful, conscious and responsible persons I have known. She is always alert about her surroundings and is very independent in her ways. (I do think that the 'being independent' part of me is something I get from her...ok, ok, now I won't get carried away talking about this). So, knowing for sure that she is more than capable of handling her things, her travels, her life my father also leaves her to her terms. One day when she got off the auto from her usual visits to the temple, she walked in excited to show my mother the new saree she had got for her (she keeps picking little things like this for all of us... how sweet). All that done she quickly realized that her little wallet was missing. She had about Rs.2000 and the most importantly the house keys. She was dejected and blamed herself for not being more careful. The sensitive side of her took the better of her and tears started rolling down.  All those thoughts of what was the driver's name (I should have read the board in the auto), what was the number plate, should have checked the seat before I got off were running through her mind and she was sad. My mother comforted her and being common sensical at a time like this called the police station and logged a complaint. Within about 1/2 an hour she received a call back saying that an auto driver has come back to hand over a purse. She was asked to visit the police station and there he was with ajji's purse and the contents intact. My mom rewarded him, thanked him kindly and happily got home. It goes without mention that ajji was elated. Such acts of kindness does exist even today and to have close encounters with it is so reassuring in the ways of the everyday world. 

Diamonds are forever:

It is a given that mom, ajji and the women of that generation coming from a middle to upper middle to the rich have always worn a pair of diamond earrings. It's like their daily jewelery. (wow, had never realized how fancy this sounds until I wrote this). Well... that's that. 

A few days after I was married and sent away, Amma and Appa had to visit Raichur for my mom's friend's father's 60th (they are like my mom's Godparents). It was a train ride and a taxi to get there with a visit to Mantralaya being a must do. Overnight train journeys in India are fun. Some decent planning needs to be done on the baggage mainly on how to secure it, the things required to sleep - air pillows, a bed spread, a cover, arrangements for food (the canteen food on train is usually good but you have take your chances with it). So, with all this my mother was crazy busy and finally at bed time sleep didn't beckon. The draft from the window made her toss and turn until it was a new day and time to get off at their station where the train halted for a mere 5 minutes. In between packing all the stuff, amma froze to realize that her earring was missing from one ear. They searched all over the little train compartment with no avail. Needless to say she was dejected, those earrings she has been wearing for a few decades, precious earrings and all in the span of a night. She silently removed the other, bought an artificial earring and had to carry on with the days. The thought never left her and the loss was huge for her. She couldn't help but think, talk, mention that loss where ever she went. As amma and appa were coming back from the temple on the hot day with my father walking way quicker than my mother she saw a sparkly object stuck to his chappals and Voila! it was the diamond earring! 

What a saga, the earring must have fallen in the train compartment and my dad might have stepped on it, the rubber beneath his chappals grabbing the earring, this could be the only explanation to what has happened. He walked on it for 2 full days before they found it. Well! Some miracles do happen! 

The Artiste & The Commoner

I have been blessed, lucky and fortunate to have been able to witness some of the finest musicians in concert and before my memory fails me I want to record some experiences that's left me totally mesmerised.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I do live and breathe music and my family has been a huge influence in me being this way. 

I remember going to my first concerts by accompanying my grandma to fort high school where the annual ramanavami functions were held. As a kid, the hot pop-corn and the prasada at the end of the day was what I looked out for, but the enthusiasm that ajji had in the music and the excitement she used to show did make me think that I was witnessing something great. The likes of Bhimsen Joshi for his brilliance in Hindustani classical and bhajans, Balamurali krishna, the epitome of classical music, U Srinivas on his mandolin, Kunnakudi Vaidhyanathan on his violin, kadri gopalnath on saxophone, amjad ali khan on sarod amongst other icons. I didn't really understand the scale at which these musicians played and what great icons they were.  Today, I reflect back thinking how fortunate I was to have had a chance to be a part of it all. I have attended a few other concerts in India which I will pen about some other time. 

Living in London, I do have a better exposure to the music of the world however my heart yearns for the Indianess in the music. I keep looking out for any concert that happens here and have been really privileged to have had a chance to see some live performances. 

I am so insignificant to be writing about some of these huge greats, however thrilled that I am to count my blessings here I go.  This might be a completely utterly boring post to read so I don't blame you if you skip it. If you have nothing else to do why don't you read on.... 

Shri Ravi Shankar - This was at Barbican and literally the last 2 seats that I managed to bag. How thrilled was I when I got the tickets delivered. He was 90+ and had a whooping 9 decades of performing on stage. The sitar was so much a part of him, with ease he played, he sang while he played and was full of zeal. I had goose bumps for most of the time. It was sheer magic. After the concert, the entourage stepped out of the stage, but the standing ovation did not stop. Just when we thought it was done we see him peeping through the curtains and waving at us. How cute was that...such a small gesture from a great man. 

Ustad Zakir Hussain - This too was at Barbican, now the sound of this place makes me think about out of the world things, remember the experiences and mesmerize over it. What a live wire performance that was. He mentioned it would be a subdued show as there was a death of his mentor, about to cancel the show he remembered the words the 'show must go on' and was up on stage to perform. Can't imagine what a usual show would be like if this was a mellow one. He rocked it, master class for sure. Some highlights were how he co-ordinated the rhythm of the tabla with all other forms of music on the stage which included a folk musical instrument from Afghanistan. Can't wait to get a chance to see him again. 

Ustad Rahat Fateh Ali Khan - I was tracking him to see when his next performance was like no tomorrow. The minute I knew there was one, I just had to have the tickets. The show was held in the O2 arena - the scale of the concerts are accentuated by the venue to start with.  He walked in, sat down, said a hello and started. With the thrill of the harmonium, his hands moved the way the voice flowed. The tour was called the Voice from Heaven and it sure was. He sang non-stop for more than 45mins. The style being Sufi, Qawali, it was like being taken back to an old world like being in a mehfil e raat. His accompaniment was his family on stage who not only provided the background music, but heightened the master's voice further. 

Raghu Dixit - Oh My God! (well! I had to say it the way Chandler's ex-girl says it). One of the loudest, clearest and in-tune voices with anything this man brings on stage. Pure rockstar effect! The brilliant colourful attire to the poems and notes from the folk world and and to top it he sings Kannada songs and makes it sound so cool and easy. Two back to back concerts, one at Reading for the Kannada Sangha (with the most awful sound system ever) and the other at the Crawley mela (don't ask me where this place is). One man who re-defines rock music,  adds a namma huduga local feel to the international star that he is.

Indian Ocean - After thinking a 1000 times whether to book or not to book, I did it and it was worth every second of my life to have been a part of this brilliance. The show was at IndigO2, the smaller arena at O2 and we were really close to the stage. It's music that's composed and played from the heart and that touches your soul. Again, the folk music feel to fuse with the western instruments with notes from the great saints and words from the divine texts, it elevates the music to a level of its own. Not a minute of boredom, got entertained, learnt something new and fell in love with their music all over again. To top that we travelled back on the same (last) train with them and chatted along. Such a simple bunch of people yet geniuses in what they do. Can't wait for another chance. 

Atif Aslam - I booked this show in the O2 as Sonu Nigam was the key performer. Sonu Nigam didn't turn up so it was Atif all the way. What a powerhouse he was. I was completely bowled over by the performance, his voice which is known for all the Oooo o oooo's and Aaaa aa aa aaa's was worth every penny. He did total justice to his time and gave us a brilliant flavour of his talent using up the other artiste's time. 

Hariharan & Shivmani - I booked this mainly for the latter. What a drummer. He produced music with just about anything - the 40+ drum set that he had, jingles, wind chimes, water with gejje(anklets) and even a suitcase. It all seemed to be in completely harmony. He kept me on the edge of my seat all through. Hariharan perhaps has one of the smoothest voices I have ever heard. His mastery over the classical tones was clearly seen, I just couldn't buy in to the fusion element. 

Salim & Suleiman - The show was at Apollo Hammersmith and I didn't really know what to expect. They are music directors and not quite singers but well what does my little brain know about talents of the other human. They were a great bunch together and the music was enchanting. Benny Dayal's singing and the moon walk he did on stage was a definite highlight.

Bombay Jayshree & Shubha Mudgal - This was the first concert I attended in London on a cold Winter's evening at Southbank. A Carnatic & Hindustani music jugalbandi. The control each has on the classical music is surreal and the  merger of the two forms of music and to hear the notes weave in and out of the other was brilliant. There weren't too many instrumental accompaniments, the other highlight was the superb tabla player. I was a tad disappointed that Shubha didn't sing any of the bollywood songs I so loved and enjoyed (yeah.... I know, I know.. such a saddo to wish for Bolly flicks in a classical concert). Well.. Mathura Nagarapathi from Raincoat is so so beautiful, it just qualifies to be anywhere. 

Sonu Nigam - He came back! After missing him in a series of concerts that happened here was a chance to get him live at the Wembley arena. I must admit that the first 45 mins got me quite bored as the choice of songs he picked were not really what I liked. He does not have a strong, loud voice - a sheer comparison after having listened to Atif Aslam, Raghu Dixit and others. The second half of the show however was simply superb. He did an audience choice for a good part of the hour and sang many requests from the crowd (whatever he could lay his ears on as people went mental). His unplugged version of 'Abhi mujme kahi' from Agneepath was very touching, I had tears in my eyes. I really like it when a singer sings a soft melody with all seriousness. Something more mindblowing was his little son running up on stage and singing the same song and Kolaveri di. The innocent voice coupled by child pronunciations was out of this world...tears flowed down again. 

Shaan - This was a part of the BBC Proms that are held at the Royal Albert Hall every year. I was thrilled to know an Indian artiste was performing. Shaan was entertaining, peppy , however it seemed to miss the X-factor that WOW effect what I look for in a live concert. It was good, nevertheless.